Sexist violence is any violence that women suffer on account of their gender. It is rooted in hierarchical relationships, that place men above women, so that as a result, women have fewer rights and opportunities. It affects women all over the world and occurs in all spaces and areas, that is, it is structural: family, school, free time, sport, public transport, music, films, social networks, etc. However, most sexual abuse is carried out in safe spaces by people the victim knows, and is expressed in a variety of ways: insults, catcalls, contempt, fits of jealousy, emotional blackmail, groping, physical abuse, cyber bullying, rape…
What is sexist violence?
- If you have ever felt humilliated, demeaned or controlled by your partner, date, ex-partner or any guy in your immediate circle (your time, mobile phone and social networks, clothes, friendships…).
- If you are fed up of creepy guys, embarrassed by chauvinistic attitudes or you don’t like ‘jokes’ and catcalls.
- If you are pressurised or fooled into having sex when you don’t want to or in a way that you don’t want to (having sex without a condom, group sex, making or sharing recordings, coming inside you…).
- If in a festive atmosphere someone gropes your backside, invades your space and your friends’ space, is pushy and treats you as if you were hysterical just because you set limits or face up to them.
- If they have tricked or forced you to consume alcohol or any drugs that you don’t want.
- If you have ever had to leave anywhere (bar, bus, street, house…) because you have felt harrassed or uncomfortable.
- If you have ever felt scared walking in the street and this has restricted you going about your daily life normally (coming home at night safely, not making plans at night…).
Recommendations for fighting against sexist violence
- On the slightest suspicion, protect yourself. You’re your own woman and have the right and legitimacy to defend yourself.
- If you need to, ask for help. Together we are stronger!
- If another woman is assaulted and you see this, help her. We are not victims, we are perfectly able to defend ourselves and our sisters!
- Do it with whoever you like whenever you like, embrace your sexuality freely! It is up to us to decide and we can set limits at any time. Our bodies and our lives are our own!
- Trust your instincts. Because we know what we like, what bothers us and what harasses us. If you feel harassed, this is an assault. The aggressor is solely responsible for this. He is the one who should be ashamed.
- Take part in feminist self-defence workshops. These are trustworthy safe spaces that will help you to reflect on why these situations occur and to provide you with tools to address them individually and collectively.
- You can turn to feminist groups in search of collective support, to publically protest if something has happened (it doesn’t necessarily have to be a judicial complaint), to get organised and network with other feminists…
- Don’t forget that you are entitled to ask for stops on demand on the Búhos (night buses).
If you have been a victim of sexist assault
- Call someone that you trust (friend or relative) to get them to help you.
- Call the support services or go to a hospital or police station.
- You have the right to receive psychological, health and legal support and care, regardless of whether you decide to report the assault or not. Don’t forget that cybercrimes (sextortion, cyber bullying, grooming…) can also be reported.
IN THE EVENT OF A SERIOUS SEXUAL ASSAULT.
- It is very important not to wash your clothes and body (mouth, genitals, other parts of the body…) until you go to a health centre, as this is how you can avoid the removal of evidence. In the event of an oral sexual assault, don’t drink or eat anything.
- Try and memorise information about the aggressor (what he was wearing, where he went…).
- You can go to feminist groups or to the Women’s Centre to get information or social support.
RESOURCES AND PHONE NUMBERS
IF YOU ARE IN DANGER:
SOS DEIAK 112 (24 hours)
IF YOU WANT INFORMATION/SUPPORT:
SATEVI: 900 840 111 (24 hours)
Acción Social (Social Welfare): 943 481 400
Casa de las Mujeres de Donostia (San Sebastián Women’s centre): 943 483 470